I get people applying to work with me every week and the main reason is because they want me to help them change their lives – they want to be happy. Some of them are quite taken aback when I tell them the goal isn't to change their life. “In a few months your life will not have changed all that much, but how you perceive your life will have undergone a radical transformation. Then, then you'll know happiness." How can this be? How can nothing about a person's life really change all that much but yet they experience a tremendous transformation in the quality of their life? Have you ever been really sick, like bedridden kinda sick for 3 days straight? How manageable is it to go to the bathroom, to make yourself a meal or even take a shower? All of those menial tasks become pretty challenging because you’re suffering, and it’s a lot to ask both physically and mentally. All you wanna do is lay in bed, sleep, and just feel better. Well what a lot of people don’t realize is that their perception, it’s kind of sick. They're seeing all the hardship in life and feeling burdened by obligation, doubt, stress, regret and ultimately, fear. They're anxious, stressed and worried over whether or not the future is going to be too challenging to achieve their goals or even maintain their lifestyle. They're constantly wrestling regret, resentment, and shame over past experiences: thinking we could’ve done something better, or that everything would be perfect if only this person had treated them better or if a certain event happened differently. They're angry, frustrated and annoyed when little things throughout their day don’t happen exactly the way they want them to. “Happiness is not by chance, but by choice.” Jim Rohn
When you’re on a road trip and you’re only looking at all the challenge it took to get you where you are, you’re all pissed off that the car isn’t nice enough, or you’re super stressed you’re not gonna make it to your destination… how happy are you gonna be? Let go. Instead you can: be proud of how far you've come, grateful that you're fortunate enough to even have a car, and wise enough to realize it's not about arriving somewhere but staying present and enjoying the journey. Now I’m not gonna sit on the edge of a sick person's bed and tell them how easy it is to shower. “You're just overthinking it! Get up and shower!” I'd probably melt under the weight of their scowl or get a pillow to the head. We have to empower ourselves instead, celebrating all the little things we’re doing well. We have to feel supported, encouraged, inspired, and motivated to perceive happiness, and it really helps to have someone hold us accountable. Little by little we'll notice a change and begin to evolve, seeing life for what it is and letting go of the past. We’ll start to see a lot more vibrancy and radiance in the present moment instead of seeing all that’s missing in life. And we’ll release the anxiety and stress tethered to the future because we’re starting to feel pretty damn good about what the future holds – and that’s an exciting and peaceful place to be. And two months from now we may be driving the same car and working at the same job, but life will be a whole lot more beautiful. Because we've made the choice to elevate our mindset and to connect spiritually. So now we know happiness in our current life instead of thinking we need to change our life in order to finally know it. This can all be achieved in a matter of months. From there you can begin transforming your life; getting that new car, starting your own business, or finding that missing thing. But those things won’t bring you happiness, because you’re already happy. They’re just the cherry on top.
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