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Losing a Dad & Becoming One Within 2 Months Time

This is my five month old son, Oliver, sitting in his late grand daddy’s work truck. I used to work with Dad for nearly a decade, riding around in that dirty truck smelling of sweat, sawdust, and a hard day’s work. I can’t walk past a lumberyard without thinking of him. One time, after an especially long, hot day, we packed up the tools then took a moment to bask in the cool AC. Dad reached for his Dr Pepper, took a sip then spat out what seemed like the entire damn can all over the windshield. I turned to him, giving him a wtf look. He pointed to his tongue, mumbling, “pucking bee stun my tun!” The bee was sliding down the windshield like it would have in a cartoon. That was some of the funniest shit a little kid could see. I say little kid but I was like 19 years old at the time. But see, Dad knew so much, and he was always teaching and helping me that I couldn’t help but feel like a little kid around him. While I’m truly humbled becoming a father, it’s also been humbling in a very different way losing my own 7 months ago. I miss his jokes, I miss energy, and I miss his talent as a carpenter, especially with all projects around the house.

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One really special moment was when Suzy and I shared our baby name pics with pops before he passed. He was the only one who knew Oliver’s name before we shared it with the world. I know it doesn’t make sense for some, but for me it makes me happy knowing they got to meet, passing one another like two shooting stars sailing through the Heavens. One of my greatest achievements in life was helping Dad to free himself of the fear of dying. He was as tough as nails, war veteran with bullet and shrapnel scars, blue collared man with an insane work ethic – but that didn't mean he wasn't scared. I spoke at length with him about what I believed happens after our soul departs the body and even read an afterlife book. I'll never forget the gleam in his eye when I inquired how he felt near the end… “I don't want to die, but I'm not scared anymore.” It made me so proud and so amazed. Here I am, this man who learned so much from his father, sharing some soulful guidance to the man so as to ease his passing. I'll never forget that moment – it's been branded within my soul. It’s funny though, catching yourself imitating things he would do and say around the house and while caring for my own son. They say imitation is the biggest form of flattery. Well, when your inspiration has passed away, I think it extends well beyond flattery. I can’t think of a better way to honor his spirit then embodying it for my son to know & love. It’s helped me grieve my father’s loss while at the same time learning to be one. It’s been quite the honor. We miss you, Dad. Happy Father’s Day to all the wonderful Dads out there. As always, if you're in need of some guidance please don't hesitate to reach out. Lots of great things coming, launching the novel, new Spiritually based online membership, and so much more! Check it out here! I'm grateful for you. Joe

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