What is a limiting belief? It’s a false belief which limits not only our chance of success but our chance of pursuing success.
Limiting: serving to restrict or restrain; restrictive; confining.
Belief: something believed; an opinion or conviction. Confidence in the truth or existence of something not immediately susceptible to rigorous proof.
Some examples of these kinds of toxic beliefs typically fall under why you CANNOT do something:
You’re not qualified or good enough.
It’s simply too hard.
External circumstances will prevent your success.
Is it your belief that the sky is blue on a clear summer’s day? Pick a clear, summer day, remove your sunglasses and gaze up at that baby blue sky. It’s there, staring back at us and smiling. Your belief is justified because there’s proof of it.
What’s a belief that doesn’t have proof? Well this depends on who you ask but the most common answer would pertain to God… and I’m not poking that bear, not now anyway. But how about the afterlife or Heaven? There’s a common belief that there’s some kind of existence after-life, here on earth. Can this be proven? Nope. But does this belief typically improve a person’s life or experience here on earth? Yup.
Most but not all people feel better about the idea of there being an afterlife. This is a belief which cannot be proven and yet at the same time it lifts our spirits. (See what I did there? The afterlife lifts… our… spirits. Knee slap – it’s crazy how fast you slide into dad joke mode as soon as you’re carting around a newborn.)
So what’s an example of a belief that cannot be proven but that makes us feel less than?
“I’m probably not going to be very successful cuz I don’t have any experience.”
Is there any proof of this belief? Well there’s proof that I don’t have any experience, yes – but there isn’t any data on my success within this new venture because I haven’t even started. So there’s no evidence of that being true. With this mere statement, I’ve established limitations on my chances – basically I’ve set myself up to fail before even lifting a finger.
Now the big thing to hone in on here is whether or not this belief makes me feel good or bad. Stated as such, this belief sure isn’t encouraging or motivating me in any way. Actually it sucks the life right outta me and any investment I put forth is shit.
I used to believe, think, speak, and act like this while working at previous jobs. I was okay at times but I’d put myself down and justify my lack of success because of this, that, or the other. It really doesn’t matter the reason, it was simply an excuse because I was insecure and leaving myself an “out”. Because if I didn’t succeed, well then there was something to blame other than myself. But guess who took all the credit if and when I did succeed? Double thumbs pointing at self. So many of us have limiting beliefs about ourselves and we don’t have a f*kin ounce of proof! Sorry this gets me all hot n’ bothered.
“I’m not good enough for him.”
“I just know I’m going to blow the interview.”
“I suck at this, I’ll never have what it takes.”
“There’s too many other candidates, they’ll never pick me.”
“I’m too (old, short, fat, stupid, unmotivated, scared.)”
None of these are true but all of them are the derivative of one thing, and one thing alone; FEAR. We’re scared we’ll fail, we’re scared we’ll succeed and then fail, we’re scared it will be too hard, we’re scared to get out of the comfy, cozy, snug as a bug (job, relationship, circumstance, etc.) and actually pursue what it is our heart yearns to fulfill. Fear limits us if we breathe life into it. If we breathe life into our dreams, we breathe life into possibility which then like a stack of dominoes breathes life into a self-worth => a plan => action => dedication => momentum => resilience => SUCCESS.
The shitty part is that like cancer, fear tries to invade our mindset every step of the way. The hardest part of achieving success is not all the steps, hard work, obstacles, time, and resources it takes for us to summit our achievement but rather fending off internal fears or limiting beliefs at every turn. It wouldn’t be so damn difficult if we remembered this key truth; every second that passes is a rebirth of opportunity. Your intention, self worth, and faith in your worthiness of achieving success is what determines whether or not you’ll achieve it. Read that again, here:
“Your intention, self worth, and faith in your worthiness of achieving success is what determines whether or not you’ll achieve it.”
Whenever you find yourself saying or even thinking a limiting belief, chuck it from your mind and heart. If you let those beliefs camp out they settle and lay down roots, which blossom into towers of regret. Whenever you believe you’re not good enough, or that all the odds are stacked up against you, or that it’s just too damn difficult – there will come a day when you regret allowing that belief to direct you away from what very well should have been your destiny.
These kinds of statement are what you need to be on the lookout for:
“I can’t because (blank).”
“I won’t because (blank).”
“It’s too hard.”
“I’m too busy.”
“(Blank) exists so why bother?”
Notice yourself saying or thinking one of these limiting beliefs? Well I’ve included some steps to: kick that shiz to the curb, center, establish self-worth, and get after it.
Now that you know a bit more about your bullshit, limiting beliefs – I’d like to ask a question. What do you really want to be when you grow up?
Dumping Limiting Beliefs
Step 1: Observe or catch yourself when you have a belief.
Step 2: Ask yourself how that belief made you feel.
Step 3: If it empowers you, great. If it justifies fear, not great. (if the belief doesn’t serve your dreams or interests then that’s telling too.
Step 4: Release the limiting belief and replace it: “I won’t make a good painter.” change to “I’ll make an excellent painter, and I owe it to myself to try.”
Step 5: Action, ask yourself what’s the first step you can take towards pursuing your desire. Take that step and then ask yourself what’s the second. Repeat until you’re looking back in awe because you freaking did it!
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